How to change the vibration in a relationship . . .

What does that mean change the vibration?

Lets get straight to it.

Is there someone in life you don’t get on with . . . ? I know there’s probably a list!

If there is someone who puts your teeth on edge, there is of course is an easy solution – avoid them. What if they are a member of your family, someone you work with ( maybe your boss) or one of your partner’s friends?

At some stage you know you are going to be in there company and you dread having to be in the same room as them, let alone having to speak.

If you have a challenging relationship in your life, whenever you are in each others company you are literally like a couple of magnets bouncing off each other. Often, no matter how hard you try, all it will take is a look, a gesture or comment and  all of your great intentions fly out of the window – sound familiar?

You may genuinely want to try and make a difference, but often the subconcious programming that runs our life will sabatage your effort, triggering that remark or look and the damage is done.

The latest scientific research behind EFT  shows that those self defeating thoughts that are often outside of our awareness can be nutralized with tapping.

Once the thoughts are cleared the body’s vibration changes . . . I hope I’m not loosing you here, it may sound a little ‘hey man after you on the yoga mat’ but this simple technique has changed my life and if you are open to new ideas it can do the same for you.

A negative cloud

I  have just returned from holiday, staying with friends who have decided to start a new life abroad. Of course this is a big step, they live in a beautiful villa and were excited about the future. However, my friend was a little unsettled as a few nights before we arrived a local character, Paul (not his real name) was being very negative saying, ‘you won’t be able to cope with the heat, the food and it will be difficult for your buisness to take off’- yes he is a real ray of sunshine.

It affected Sue so much that she felt like returning home. As Paul was a member of their small social group it would be difficult to avoid him and she dreaded the thought of having to be in his company again.

Sue’s partner was worried as so early in their new venture there was talk about going home.

A silver lining

I suggested an EFT session to help change her mindset.

We worked on the worst case scenario and I asked Sue to imagine she was going be in a room with Paul later that day. When we scaled the strongest negative emotion, dread, from (0-10) it was easily a 10. Also when I asked her if she felt the stress in her body, she complained of a headache.

We focused on the feelings of dread, after a few rounds of ‘tapping’ she began to feel more relaxed, lighter and less concerned about Paul.  As we tapped another few rounds on the negative, she began to feel calmer and more optimistic, also, Sue’s  headache had gone.

The genie out of the lamp

When negativity is lessened, our mind is more ready to accept positive affirmations (how we would ideally like to feel when under pressure, in EFT we call this the genie out of the lamp)

We finished the session by tapping a few rounds on being excited and enjoying her time in this new adventure. Also, whenever she was in Paul’s company she would like to be calm, relaxed and courteous- but essentially not bothered.


I returned home and a week later I received an email from Sue saying she was in their weekly social group with Bill and she was amazed that she felt great, not bothered at all.

The key

The key is to realise you can only control yourself, your feelings, your actions and your vibration. You cannot control how the other person reacts, however, using EFT to take the power from your negativity often produces remarkable results.

When you next meet your public enemy number one, because you are free of that negative vibration there is nothing bounce off. Incredibly this sends the person off balance, without the repelling force this often results in a positive response.

In my experience it works with any relationship and the results are often astonishing.

Have you ever experienced problems in a relationship that you would like to resolve?

Let me know of your challenges and find out what’s possible when you change your vibration. Leave a comment or if you prefer please email me at and I’ll speak to you in confidence.

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